Unsolicited Looksmaxxing to Look Like a Greek God
Tomás Bjartur sent me down the rabbit hole of this statue:
Just look at this magnificence. Can you imagine hiring an artist to make this statue on the left, going “nah too erotic, your older brother will know what’s up” and then the older brother makes this statue on the right.
The statues are apparently in St. Paul's Cathedral in Liège, Belgium, and so I guess I am going to Belgium.
If you want to looksmaxx for looking like a Greek God specifically, here are some tips.
Use Olive Oil
You do not need to take an entire bath in olive oil. You can get the spray-on-skillet olive oils, and just keep them around for when you feel like it.
You know that feeling when you are taking too many showers, perhaps because it is summer and you are working out and also swimming? And then you are feeling too dry? You can spray yourself with olive oil a little bit, and then not be that dry. There, done.
It is good for your skin, your hair, and your nails. It can be a little heavy, but that’s why you are just spraying some on versus lathering it on yourself.
Use Elastic Bands
Use wide elastic bands and stretch your upper back. Go on youtube and find some videos. Be inspired. The point is not to strength train with the bands. The point is to stretch parts of your back you normally would not think to stretch, and this gets your back used to being in the right position when you are just going about your day, having awesome Greek God posture, or when you are working out, so that the right parts are activated.
I learned this from a guy in the navy, and then again at my climbing gym, so it’s probably good.
Look in the mirror or on your phone and fawn over yourself
There is no reason not to fawn over yourself. Even if you hate yourself there is probably part of yourself that you like. Such as your sexy big toe. Or how your arm looks in that specific lighting with that one lamp.
Do not go “oh well that just looks good under that one lamp specifically.” Do not insult the Glory of God. If you notice perfection upon you, then enjoy it.
Look at old photos of yourself that you liked and fawn over those too.
Aristotle’s ideas of virtue involved becoming more of yourself, and more of who you want to become, through practice of being that. And so by looking at yourself looking like how you want to look, you internalize the image a little more, and actually become that more.
Literally Go to Museums and Pose Like the Statues
Feel the essence. Do not fear embarrassment. If you want to look legit, bring a sketchbook and some pencils, so that it looks like you are a true artist doing the subject its due service. There are all kinds of classes for all age ranges that mandate going to museums and doing weird things. Just have your sketchbook and some story, and you’ll be fine.