Assorted Thoughts For 500 Words
Today is the closest I got to messing up and not writing my blog post, because I was watching the final episodes of Avatar the Last Airbender for the second time, and it is a terrific show.
What to write about…
People optimized a lot as teenagers, after playing a lot as kids. Then in adulthood they realize that a lot of the optimizations didn’t get them where they wanted to go. And then they stop doing them because things like social network, relationships, where you are in life, what tragedies you’d had to deal with, all seem like they matter a lot more than if the speed it takes you to unload the dishwasher is optimized based on which cabinets you decided the forks are going to be living in. However, something like optimizing your movements by choosing a drawer for your forks to live in based on proximity to the dishwasher can make your life a lot better.
It does seem like it is working, on experiment day 2 so far, that if you try to eat a lot more protein you do feel very full and very full in a way such that you do not want to eat a lot of random things because you are very full.
Things I ate today:
an omelette, 2 eggs, egg whites, cottage cheese with chives, a small onion, a small tomato, some Parmesan cheese extra cottage cheese cold on top after it was done. I ate half of this thing, then saved the other half for dinner, because I was really full.
For dinner, I ate this other half of this thing, and then a fist-sized amount of a pasta I made, which was orecchiette with mushroom soup that I turned into a sauce, with sausage, and parsley and basil. Then for desert it was a banana yogurt with 20 grams of protein, and some frozen blueberries microwaved on top.
And then bits of cookie that were left for me, that were fun, but that I didn’t really need. And then some vitamins and some tea. Probably 1500 - 1600 calories there, which would be a calorie deficit for me without doing any calorie counting. And “being in a calorie deficit without doing much counting” is my goal.
Tired of thinking about losing weight again. Into thinking about just getting jacked again. My body rewards me very well when I go to the gym, treat it like a spa, work out whatever I want, do the massage chair at planet fitness, go home, shower, eat whatever I want as long as it is protein and vegetables. I have put in the hours of pain and torment for years, before. The reward is that I actually have good instincts at the gym and when I eat. In some ways I am a n00b. In some ways I am pretty cool and my body is pretty cool. Generally leaning into your strengths is better, I’d found.
What else. I allowed a Faust reading group to infiltrate my dreams, in a very literal way, as I joined the call while too sick and asleep, stayed on the call…
I am coming to grips more with my mortality. I feel much less of a need to be self conscious. Writing on the internet is a beautiful thing. The point is not to be found. The point is not to live a life of constant worry about legacy while doing not much about it.